Have You Had the "Enough Is Enough" Moment?
Updated: Oct 21, 2020
Allow me to wear my story on my sleeve and tell you about a time where I felt like life was passing me by; enough was enough. Here are resources and tools to find presence in your life.
I was perusing a Magnolia Journal edition, copies sprawled across my bed as I sought inspiration, when I came across an intriguing article.
About a year since it was published, I found myself eagerly reading a note from the lovely Joanna Gaines on resolve; being content to the richness that lies in the present. I finished the page, sat still in thought, then fell into my pillows to thoroughly reflect on what I had just read.
There was a particular section of the article that continued to cycle through my mind. She wrote about the idea that we acknowledge our lives as past and future, rarely thinking in the present.
“...I decided that enough was enough, and I challenged myself to spend this year living in the present. To quiet the voice inside my head that tells me the good ol’ days have passed me by or that the best is yet to come.”
Realizing enough is enough; that is a sacred moment. There is so much power that comes with the discovery that you’ve been experiencing life in the peripheral.
Laying on my cluttered bed that warm Wednesday evening, I was brought back to the moment when I realized enough was enough. Ironically, it was lying in bed…a very different bed.
Before this post gets heavy and annoyingly preachy, I want to make it clear that I want to share my story with you as a mirror for your own struggles and triumphs. I want to spark that lay-on-the-bed-lost-in-thought contemplation for you.
MY "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH" STORY
My college career, what is supposed to be the best four years of your life full of poor adolescent decisions and minimal responsibility, was plagued with poor health.
I had 3 serious concussions and a surprise surgery. Here's a little context:
The first concussion occurred before college, and when handled poorly, forced me to cut my freshman year short by a semester. It got to the point where I couldn’t look at a screen, and I couldn’t write or read for more than a few minutes. I really couldn’t do much of anything besides walk the dog, eat, and call my boyfriend (God bless him).
This lasted for about 9 months.
During that time, I became obsessed with thinking about the past and the future. My present was bleak, so that’s what gave me hope.
I honestly never fully got over that concussion when I experienced the next concussion in college just before my junior year.
Although it was extremely frustrating, I truly believe that it took that concussion to light a fire under my rump to really take my symptoms seriously and do whatever I needed to do to get better. And, since I'm typing a blog post, I did.
But then came senior year and with it another concussion. Dun dun dunnnnn.
My mental health was in the toilet to say the least. I rarely thought about being present.
When you go through something devastating, something that prevents you from being the person you want to be, you don’t want to be there. You want to be in the memories of your past, the visions of what life would’ve looked like in the present, and the dreams of what it could be in the future.
You beg for milestones to arrive. You want the day to flow into the next.
Halfway through senior year, mostly recovered from my concussion, I found myself in the hospital needing a surprise surgery. I promise, this is where it all connects.
Lying in the hospital bed with my boyfriend miraculously asleep on the side chair among beeps and visitors, I was wide awake in prayer, feeling numb yet composed.
This was my “enough is enough” moment.
There I lay, college about to pass me by, and I decided to no longer waste my days wishing. Despite the ailments, I did have happy and fun moments in college. Of course I wished there were more Friday nights and developed friendships, but what good did that serve me?
This was my life; my one chance to be 22 with whatever bliss I could find.
That night in the hospital, I texted my mother to bring my laptop the next day, and I created a collage of the moments from 2019 that made me feel alive. It was a ratchet-y Photoshop job that brought joy and reflection.
From then forward, I made a commitment to myself that I would try to live in the present as much as I could. If unforeseeable circumstances would occur (including an unprecedented global pandemic), I would try my hardest to not wallow in what could have been; no more living for the future.
As I report to you now, I really have stayed true to my promise. I created this patched-together blog to inspire moments of presence for others, and I’ve been exploring my own potential along the way. I feel present and somehow that has brought even more excitement for what is to come.
Now, what about you?
I want you to reflect on this “enough is enough” moment.
I know it seems a little "come to Jesus"-y, but it really has made a huge difference in my life. Finding presence, or discovering your lack there of, is unique to you. Let's explore how this is relevant to your life.
Below you will find a good old flow chart quiz similar to those that you would find in a tween magazine. This quiz walks you through your experience with presence. I created this so that you could really connect with the topic and apply your findings.
In need of more self-reflection? Check out the Wellness Week recap for insights on the 8 Dimensions of Wellness & how you can achieve positive well-being!
You know, I really don’t like talking about this personal depressing stuff; I like this blog to be a source of positivity for the community. However, I wanted to show you some vulnerability so that you might allow yourself to be vulnerable, too.
The society around us can make us feel so disconnected from the present, but here is the nudge that says today you can change that.
I recently started to picture the girl I was 15 years ago running on a soccer field. I was free and strong and proud to be me. When this picture first entered my mind, it felt distant. Soon after I acknowledged that estranged feeling, and I asked myself, “why?”
I may be older and have experienced more life but that doesn’t mean I can’t experience those feelings now.
It doesn’t seem like a radical realization, but it was for me.
So now I chase that feeling every day. I look for moments of spontaneity and I jump at them. I don’t put the weight of the world on my shoulders; I see the beauty in imperfection now more than ever.
This outlook is a beautiful thing. Better yet, it IS in my control.
I’ve made the choice to wear it; how will you proceed?